As Good As "Inconclusive" Gets

After firing that email about my CEA labs off to my chemo docs, I got a call back within 45 minutes.

Now, cancer sucks all kinds of rocks, but I have to say that when it comes to The University of Wisconsin Paul P. Carbone Comprehensive Cancer Center, the customer service I have gotten there is the absolute cat's pajamas.

Now, stray one foot outside the cancer center, and YMMV, but those guys are the best. BEST!

Oh right--the results.

So, remember how when I had that first colonoscopy and we were all "OMG THE SKY IS FALLING" and then I weaseled my CEA results out of some poor receptionist and I was all "1.0?! I so don't have The Cancer, I don't care what that doctor saw" and then that nurse was all "Remember what the doctor told you?" and I was all "But my CEA is wicked low, yo!" and she was all "Yeah, but."

:::A year passes:::

I got the call back from my doc's #1 guy and he was happy to report that my CEA was less than 0.5. I don't know if that's as low as it can go, but it's pretty damn low, so that's a good thing, even though we really can't gauge my situation by this tumor marker for colorectal cancer because according to te results of my first CEA lab work, I had no cancer (1.0), despite the gigantic tumor that was growing in my [completely taken for granted, fondly remembered, occasionally mourned] rectum.

Upshot: My CEA level is about as good as it can be, but I'm still going to get scaned every 6 months (instead of the usual protocol of every year) because my CEA is not a reliable metric in my case.

In other news, my Christmas cards are going out before the actual holiday. A Christmas miracle, indeed.